Taking Honey Home....

This past week has been a whirlwind of activity, coupled with long hours of solitude while driving to and from Tennessee where honey and I lived for so long. While primarily it was to spend time with our grown boy's and return their mother's ashes and mementos, I was also able to visit some very dear friends and even witness (behind the curtain!) the birth of the fifth grandchild in a very special family.

To ALL of them, I say thank you, for including me in such a precious moment and I know that the upcoming sixth grandchild (in about a month) will be a wonderful blessing as well. I am honored and blessed beyond words by your love and kindness. To those of you that I missed, I apologize...inclement weather (In Iowa) cut my trip shorter than planned. Such is life...we do the best we can.

The time spent with my boy's was emotional and special as well. I got to see firsthand how they're not only coping with the loss of their mother but doing their best to fulfill her (our) desire to live fully and to pursue happiness each day. I'm proud of both of them and I know my honey would be bursting at the seams. David and Josh...I love you. I know that juggling your work schedules and personal schedules is always challenging, I enjoyed every minute we spent together! :o)

I was able to visit many of the places honey and I lived and loved...time changes many things but the memories remain. Bittersweet and tearful as it was, I'm glad I took the time to see them again. The next task on her list is too give her personal belongings (clothing, etc.) to those in need. I found a local shelter for battered women and children and it will be receiving most of it. I think she'd have liked that...boxing those will be HARD but I intend to have it finished by the end of this coming weekend.

After that? I just don't know...the rest of honey's list isn't something I can predict or put a specific time to. The knees are coming along but are stiff and swollen from all the hour's of driving. Ice and elevation will take care of that in a day or two. Baring the unforeseen I should be able to return to work by my target date of February 16^th.

I'm still trying to find my footing and struggling to keep my mind and heart open to the possibility of happiness and love. I KNOW I have those things in my children and dear friends....it's what keeps me moving me forward. At this point, I can't imagine ever finding a personal relationship like I had with my sweet honey. Impossible. So...I will just keep doing the best I can each and every day. I have goals and task to complete once I return to work and that in itself will keep me busy for the immediate future.

I am thankful for what I have...yes dear. But damn, I miss you my girl....forever my sweet honey.